Putting Homeschooling Gurus on a Pedestal

I have many things I’d like to say on this matter. But I’m having a hard time putting it into words. For now, I’d like to direct you to a blog post at the Common Room. I need some time to reflect on this.


8 Responses to “Putting Homeschooling Gurus on a Pedestal”

  1. Karen Joy Says:

    I really, really enjoyed that article. I’d never heard of *any* of the experts she’d mentioned, though that may not be too surprising, given that I tend not to seek out published “experts” on anything — from homeschooling to parenting to my Christianity…

  2. Sunnymom Says:

    I left a comment at The Common Room, but here I’d like to say that there are people whose opinions, insights, and experiences I respect, but no one to whom I abdicate my own judgment. At the end of the day, I have to look my own self in my God-given eyeballs, and answer to my own conscience.

    I have seen, in every walk of life, parents who live their lives vicariously through their children, or who seem to gain their own identity through their children’s accomplishments. Just go to a kiddie beauty pageant or Little League game- and homeschoolers are made from the same clay as the rest.

  3. Karen Joy Says:

    As a Little League mom, defensiveness rose up in me at Sunnymom’s last sentence there, but I have to admit, it’s true for some parents. I can remember Dads who berate their sons, sons who have obvious little skill or interest in baseball… The Dads seem embarrassed, and take it personally that their son isn’t the star, and I have thought before that those men are trying to make their sons into what they wish they were….

    This is sort of OT, but I don’t think there’s anything wrong with hoping one’s children are interested in the same things that we are — it’s my delight that my oldest son loves baseball and reading, and my middle son loves hiking, and that all my kids love making music, etc. But trying to make one’s children what they’re not, as if it were a personal achievement, to me seems wrong.

  4. Sunnymom Says:

    I hope you know that I wasn’t aiming at anyone in particular- merely pointing out that certain behaviors can be seen in any group of parents, not just homeschoolers in particular. 😉

    I agree- it is nice when your kids enjoy the things you do, or take interest in the same things you find interesting. On the same note, it stretches me personally when my one of my kids comes up with something radically different- how fun and exciting to see their individuality emerge. 😀

  5. deputyheadmistress Says:

    As for not having heard of the people I mentioned- gotta share a funny, and then I have to figure out how to fix it on my blog. My firstborn tells me she doesn’t think Reb Bradley is who I thought he was. I got him mixed up with a different guru. Went and checked, and she’s right. I have heard of him, but I do not think I own a book he’s written.

    I’ve been doing some looking up of various homeschooling gurus- and I am astonished at how many of them were giving long term parenting advice when their children were not yet ten years old- few of them have children older than mine.

  6. Karen Joy Says:

    Tammy ~ I sincerely hope you’re enjoying the conversation and don’t feel like we’re hijacking your thread!

    Sunnymom ~ Of course, no personal offense was intended by you!! And really, none was taken. You’re right about kids stretching us and developing their own interests. In fact, before we had kids, my husband and I determined that we were NOT going to foist our interests onto our children, but let them develop their own. It has been a huge surprise to me to see my kids — with little prompting from me — enjoy the same things I do. It’s made me wonder if, for example, enjoying baseball is genetic!! 😀 But, as you say, there is another delight in seeing their personalities emerge and express interest in things that don’t necessarily pique my own — from my daughter’s obsession with shoes to my oldest son’s deep interest in geology. I want to facilitate and encourage their individual interests…

    DHM ~ Immediately sprung to my mind, from Princess Bride: “I do not think him is who you think him is.” Hehehe.

  7. Tammy Says:

    Thanks for the thoughts on this everyone.

    There is indeed a healthy balance to be found where we can appreciate the things that we enjoy with our kids, while not putting pressure on them to be a certain way.

    As it relates to Gurus… I think the same thing is possible – a balance between appreciating what they have to say without following them blindly.

  8. Sunnymom Says:

    I have several books by Raymond and Dorothy Moore, a couple by Ruth Beechick, one by Linda Dobson, and one by David and Laurie Callihan. I enjoyed them and kept them because there are pricniples in those books that rang true in my own soul, based on my own experiences and insights.

    Nobody’s is right until *I* think they are right. 😀

    Sometimes I think Oprah Winfrey is guilty of inventing the guru. :p

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