Celebrating Valentine’s Day Without School

Passing out cards in class – does it teach kids how to be loving and kind towards each other on Valentine’s day?

I used to think so, but now, I’m not so sure. I remember doing this through elementary school, and we had to give cards to everyone in the class so that nobody would be left out. But once we hit a certain age, we weren’t made to do it anymore. Then, at some point, giving out cards to people was mockable, unless it was to someone of the opposite sex and we were trying to say, “Would you go with me?”

Then in college, I didn’t even think to give V-day cards to people, except my current beau. I think my dad might have recieved a couple cards here and there through my 20’s.

I don’t think giving out V-day cards to the whole class did anything to shape my understanding or belief of the meaning of V-day.

And then, at some point, I learned the V-day was a creation of the greeting card industry, like so many holidays have been made into these huge gift-giving, card-buying things by commercialism.

So, for a while, I was completely burned out on card-giving. Some people give up meat, I gave up greeting cards. I couldn’t stand the waste of paper, nor the waste of money. I also was annoyed that the whole reason that these cards exist is because of the holiday, which was perpetrated by the greeting card company, etc.

So today I’m presented with “what to do” about giving something to hubby. I like giving him things, and and I like showing love to my family. I don’t need a holiday to do that. But a holiday is a good time to stop and do a special thing, stare my hubby in the eyes and tell him I love him.

What did I end up doing? I wrote him a poem, and got him a six pack beer, some pistachios, a box of his favorite cookies, and Altoids (also his fave).

For my kids, I got them some candy, because they oooooh so love candy.

Today, I feel the love. That’s what today is about. Not passing out cards. I don’t need to pass cards out to every person I know to feel the love. Passing out cards can be done without a loving heart. There’s no way to teach children how to have a loving heart with things. The only way to teach children that is for them to be around other people who love the people around them. Some people use cards to show that love, but that’s not the only way. There are lots of ways to show love. And so, I don’t ask my kids to make cards for their friends and family. If they want to, they can. But our kids, they have truly loving hearts. That you can plainly see. So, I don’t need a card from them.

To me, my kids celebrate the love of Valentine’s day every day.

Happy Valentine’s day to you all. Happy every day to you all. Peace and Loving Kindness to everyone.

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3 Responses to “Celebrating Valentine’s Day Without School”

  1. kamrin Says:

    Hear! Hear! We have done the same in our house. I love that my kids don’t know of the card giving. I also love they don’t spend the day loading up on junk food and candy only to come home sick from it all, with no better understanding of how to show someone you love them.

  2. Melissa Says:

    Great entry, Tammy! We are the same — “anti-Hallmark Holidays” in our house. I’m writing a blog entry on this topic, too. Thanks (always) for the inspiration. Love ya!

  3. Anna Says:

    Here is craziness: Some schools here no longer have Valentine’s Day–it is Frienship Day. And they don’t have the party on the 14th.


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